Broken Britain

I got back yesterday to the news that somebody has flytipped an old cooker in the clear-felled bit of forest down the road. I was going to report it, but I checked the council website and found they’ll only act if it’s on council land and it’s up to the landowner if it’s anywhere else. There is a number you can ring, but that’s only for dobbing someone in if you’ve seen them flytipping, not for getting it cleared up. It’s a bit tough on the landowner having to get rid of someone else’s rubbish, but if it isn’t cleared soon it will only attract more dumped waste. Grrr. We might as well still be living in Lambeth where there were dumped kitchen appliances under every railway bridge, possibly gone feral and almost certainly breeding.


the depths they'll sink to

But that isn’t all. We saw the council van down working on the ford this afternoon and naturally we had to go and have a look and a chat. They were taking advantage of the dry weather to fix the epic potholes the frost had left and clear out the blocked pipes under the road bed (we may have trouble reaching any new high scores if this goes on). We pointed out the broken plank on the foot bridge and the chatty chap told us how his colleague had driven the snow plough down the one-in-five hill last winter (‘you just point it down the hill, and let it go where the road takes you’). And then we admired their pothole filling progress (quick drying cement is the key, apparently). ‘We only fixed it last year and now look at it,’ he said. ‘And we had to replace the water depth level signs because someone had pinched them. They’re made of aluminium, you see, so they’re worth money. They’re riveted on now, but if someone wants them, they’ll take them.’

Seriously, is nothing sacred? Still, maybe if the metal prices go up again, the cooker problem will solve itself…

3 Responses to Broken Britain

  1. Mikeachim says:

    Ah, well, your area of Britain they’d nick your dental fillings if there’s enough money in doing so.

    – Racistchim

    The idea of two rusty cookers engaged in coitus under railway bridges is one that will stalk my nightmares. Thank you. I may never cycle under them again. (Railway bridges, not rusty cookers engaged etc etc.)

  2. disgruntled says:

    No no no – the Scots are careful of their own money, not covetous of other people’s. Besides, anything that’s wrong round here is clearly the fault of the English…

  3. Dom says:

    The depths people will sink to…

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