Whoops, did I really think a year or so back that my bike had reached peak Fred? Since then I have not only added a hub dynamo (and a cow-patterned pannier bag) but the other half also got me a dynamo-driven rear light which he fitted a few weeks back in time for the nights closing in. This necessitated a cascade of changes (which seems to be the law for any bike modification): the rear light wouldn’t fit on my back rack, so a new rack with a light mount had to be purchased and then it emerged that my bike had no rack braze-ons despite looking like a touring bike.* The old rack had been inventively bodged on by Common Wheel when they fitted out the bike, and the other half had to equally inventively bodge the new one on, a job which involved finding a nice piece of alloy, machine tools and some whistling and sorting through his screw collection. Rack bodged, light fitted, and it emerged that my lock could now no longer be bungeed securely to the top of it (or even insecurely; to be honest it had already had a tendency to leap suicidally into traffic whenever I hit a pothole).
Now, while any sort of practical modification to a bike tends to increase its freddishness, especially if it looks a bit eccentric and proper cyclists sneer at it (see also kickstands, mudguards), I would maintain that true fredism is achieved when the modifications are also home-made, unique and improvised from unlikely materials, ideally recycled.
I therefore present to you my hand-carved varnished wooden-and-recycled-inner-tube lock-carrying solution, courtesy of the other half, much shed time and a number of design iterations.
And yes, I know one can buy a plastic lock carrying bracket thing for your frame but where’s the fun in that?
As a bonus, the top of the rear rack is now free, which means I can investigate the practicalities of fitting a rear crate on the back, which will increase its freddishness further but may necessitate another cascade of changes to allow me to continue to use the cow pannier as well. I suspect further bodging may be in prospect.
* I write that as if I knew what it meant, but all I really know about braze-ons is that every bike seems to have to have a unique combination of them and that any attempt to fit anything on a bike ends up with somebody sucking their teeth and explaining that it can’t be done because you don’t have the right ones for that particular thing.